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Friend : So how was your date? Woman : Oh my gosh it was amazing!! The best I ever had! It was cosmic! Friend : On the first date? Wow! Woman : I know! It was the best veal Parmesan I have ever had! > > --5th Ave
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Gay #1 : Sometimes, I just wish I was a stripper. Gay #2 : Oh, I would totally go to see you. Lesbian : Yeah, me too, but only if you can make the mangina. > > --Porn Shop, West Village > > Overheard by: me too...
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Girl, on escalator : Oh! I'm definitely getting a brownie. Guy, on escalator : Really? Girl : Yep, it's going to be full-fat and wonderful! Guy : You'll eat a brownie, but you won't touch my nuts? > > --Barnes & Noble, Union Square > > Overheard by: Diane
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yeP!
Kevin Barnes
Guy : So she got all pissed at me cuz of what I said, but she asked me! And I'm gonna be blunt. I mean, if she's gonna go get herself pregnant, then yeah, she should get fixed up afterwards. Girl : Damn straight. > > --Park Ave & 36th St
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Old time New Yorker to EMS workers and crowd : Sit down! Suburban princess : God! Have some compassion! Can't you see she's sick? Old time New Yorker : Fuck you! > > --Subway Series 2007, Shea Stadium > > Overheard by: Amazed Mets Fan
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Shea Stadium
Tot, slapping storybook shut : No! The end! Father : Leee-o. Tot : Pleeease no! > > --F Train > > Overheard by: Deborah Smith
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Posted 2009-12-01
Indie Music
Train
Girl #1 : He's a really great guy, and even if he can't help you, he's cute and has the most charming Irish accent... Girl #2 : Okay, but does he speak English? > > --Hudson & Leonard
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Leonard Cohen
Smoking cook, watching busty girl carrying shopping bags : Jesus... Busty : I'm not Jesus, I'm the wardrobe lady! And my boobs are real! > > --12th & 6th > > Overheard by: that guy
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Student #1 : Oh, all the t-shirts are mediums. Student #2 : Well, that's okay, that just means they'll be really long. Like a dress! Student #1 : Oh my god, we could totally wear them as dresses, with like, tights and cowboy boots. Student #2 : We would. Student #1 : We so would. > > ...
Indie Music
Mousy teen girl : You know, a lot of people say I look like Paris Hilton. They say it's my facial features. Trendy teen girl : Yeah... You know, even though Paris is really skinny and has big boobs, and that's exactly what guys want, her face is disgusting. Mousy teen girl, looking down ...
Indie Music
Train
Child : Daddy, can we get a dog? Dad : No, they don't do anything. At least Sid and Nancy keep the mice away. > > --Tribeca > > Overheard by: jae
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Girl #1 : I mean, she's okay, but she's not a diva... Girl #2, angrily : Hannah Montana is the most popular girl in America, admit it! > > --FIT > > Overheard by: yacky
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Montana
Guy #1 : You guys should put on a musical next year! Guy #2 : We would, but a musical's pretty elaborate. I mean, we have plenty of girls who can sing, but no guys at all. Guy #1 : Oh! Then you should, like, do The Vagina Monologues, The Musical ! ! Guy #2 : (stares) > > --3rd Ave & 10th ...
Indie Music
High school guy #1 : Dude, you look so hot today! High school guy #2 : Seriously, dude? High school guy #1 : Yeah, man. If we were gay, I'd so do you! High school guy #2 : I thought the same thing about you. > > --Chelsea > > Overheard by: Robert
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Suit #1 : I've been reading about this British kid, Elliot Castro, he's some big time credit card fraudster. I've got his book. Suit #2 : Castro? Suit #1 : Yeah. Suit #2 : A Castro from Britain? Suit #1 : Well, yeah, not British heritage I guess. Suit #2 : Oh, okay. (pause) They got ...
Indie Music
Drunk Southern chick : And I knew that when he said "fuck you" it was over... You'd never say that to me, would you? Sober Southern guy : (stares blankly) Drunk Southern chick : Yeah, I know you would. > > --Lower East Side > > Overheard by: I Agree With Him
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Boy : Man, this semester I'm going to fuck everyone. I'm gonna be a real man-whore. Friends : Uh-huh. Man leaving train : Someone should tell him it's hard to be a man-whore with his zipper down. > > --F Train
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Train
Guard to elderly tourists at elevator to roof : Please swing the line around the corner. Elderly tourist : Ve don't sving. > > --Metropolitan Museum
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Drag queen : With an accent like that, I know you drink. German : No, really, I dun't! Drag queen : But then how can I take advantage of you if you're sober? > > --Lucky Cheng's
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Teenage tourist boy to friend, gesturing at a gay couple : They're holding hands! Passing art lover : There's no one holding your hand, sweetheart. > > --Metropolitan Museum of Art > > Overheard by: Richard Nixon
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